How Did I Find Out About My Cancer?

I went to get a consultation on Oct 5th because I was having a hard time breathing. I thought it was just because of my allergies but I felt like I needed to get checked. They got me in the same day and I went to see a doctor who is not my primary physician. She checked my breathing and said that I needed to get X-ray because there wasn't any flow on my right lung. Her suspicion was correct I had fluid built up on my right lung.

She then scheduled me to get a procedure called "Thoracentesis" for the following week. (It's to drain the fluids from my right lung". The shortness of breath got worse so I had to go to E.R. to get the procedure done ASAP. They admitted me for the weekend then I was able to go home Sunday afternoon (Just in time for the Patriots). They did a CT scan, a bunch of blood tests and even tested the fluid that they collected.

Friday, Oct 14 the nurse called me and asked me if I could come in the afternoon to see a pulmonologist for my test results. I was very naive and didn't think of anything when she said to bring someone with me. So I came in and the doctor had told me that I have Stage 4 lung cancer. I felt numb. Disbelief. Confused. Shocked. Discouraged.

I texted Kevin while he was at work, I should’ve just waited until he got home because I got him worried sick. I picked up my mom from her work, went home straight to my bedroom without saying anything. I felt like I stopped, but the world kept on moving. Kevin got home, he was already almost in tears and asked me what was going on. I finally broke down and told him the news. We felt like the world collapsed on us, it was such a bitter pill to swallow. The worse part was telling our kids. I could handle pretty much anything, but telling them was the most difficult thing that I’ve ever done in a very long time. I never wanted to be the bearer of bad news but we had to tell them. The next day we told my mom and Kevin’s parents and more people as we went on.

I treat this page as my diary, it’s hard for me to speak about my self face to face that is why this is such a great platform to document the process.

I don’t have the guts to tell my family in the Philippines. I can’t tell my dad on my own. I need your prayers to help me have the strength to do so.

I was talking to my friend Shelby this afternoon and I told her that it may be so weird to say this but I find rest even in my situation because I lean and cling to God. When I feel discouraged, I look up to Him, I worship Him and thank Him for all the good things He’s done in my life.

I am believing that He’s not done with me YET. He has a plan for my life, to give me future and hope. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I will fear no Evil for He is with me. How do I know this? Because God said it Himself... He gave us access to Him through Jesus Christ. There are so many ways to get to know Him better, open the bible, download the Bible app, start a daily plan and get to know Jesus. Listen to worship music, my favorite artists are Darlene Zchech, Lauren Daigle, Natalie Grant, Matt Maher, Bethel Music, Hillsong, Israel Houghton and many more.

Here is today’s bible verse:

Psalm 59:16 “But I will sing of your strength,in the morning I will sing of your love;for you are my fortress,my refuge in times of trouble.”